A man in his 40’s bought a new big engined BMW 5-series and was out driving on the motorway considerably over the speed limit when he suddenly saw flashing blue lights behind him.
“There’s no way they can catch a BMW,” he thought to himself and sped up even more. Then the reality of the situation hit him, “What the heck am I doing?” he thought and pulled over.
The Police officer came up to him, took his driving license without a word, and examined it and the car. “It’s been a long day, it’s the end of my shift, and it’s Friday the 13th. I really don’t feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.”
The guy thinks for a second and says, “Last week my wife ran off with a Policeman. I was afraid you were trying to give her back.”
“Have a nice weekend,” smiled the officer and returned to his car.
A guy goes down for breakfast and it is quite obvious that his wife has the hump with him. He asks what is the matter.
She replies, “Last night you were talking in your sleep and I want to know who Linda is?”
Thinking quickly on his feet he tells her that Linda was ‘Lucky Linda’ and was actually a name of a horse that he bet on that day and won £40. She seemed quite happy with the explanation and he went off to work. When he got home that night, his wife had the hump with him again.
Asking her what the matter was now, she replied “Your horse phoned.”